I always tell people who are grieving to take care of themselves.

Because when I am deep in grief, it always feels like the hardest thing to do is to put myself first.

However, it’s what the person I am grieving would want me to do.

Honor that love and the pain it brings you by honoring yourself. Don’t forget to eat. Get enough sleep. If you have the energy, go take a shower and brush your teeth. Do those little things that will make you cry because they’re the little things the person you miss will never do again.

It’s okay to keep living when someone you love is dead. <3

So I find this advice to be beautiful, and perfect. When I was 19 a friend of mine was murdered, and this is the sort of advice that saw me through that dark time.

When I can, when someone I know has lost someone close and important, I send food. A hamper, or just meals from a nearby restaurant . Because I know that when death happens, the last thing most people want to do is prepare food or think about food and the thing all of them have to do is eat. And it's a practical thing I can do.

It's easy to support strikes at first - to swap memes and say "Go Union!" and tell writers we support them.

It's harder two months in. Four months. Eight.

If this goes like the last few writers' strikes - it means a terrible tv season, a delay in movies, big changes in late-night talk shows (the talk isn't scripted; the monologues and jokes are--and they don't have half a dozen scripts in the can; they have to be written based on recent news), and other areas we won't notice until it's underway.

Strikes are a game of chicken. AMPTP is counting on public backlash to convince the WGA to back down, and that won't happen right away.

The writers are risking a lot for this. They're not getting paid while they wait. (There may be strike funds, but there are no new project deals, no bonuses, no overtime pay, and so on. And the strike fund isn't unlimited.) They're pinning a lot of hope on the skills of their negotiators.

So when they tell you what would help - believe them. That's always "don't cross the picket lines" and "express support publicly" and "if you can get there in person, the picket lines appreciate coffee and snacks." It is always "don't take a scab job doing the work that someone on strike is refusing to do." (Note that in this case, the WGA has the right to block future membership from scabs. You can't get an edge in the industry by taking the jobs that are going to open up.)

Anything other than that, the negotiators try to figure out.

Maybe that's "It'd help if people suspend or cancel their streaming services." Maybe it's "please DON'T suspend or cancel them - that's how they feel the pressure to produce new content. If people cancel, they'll claim there's less demand, less money for the writers."

We're on the outside, and there's a lot of moving parts. Listen to the union when they tell you how you can help.

And be ready to stand by them, even months later when (1) your new shows on TV suck, because the only scripts available are the ones that were initially rejected, and (2) the AMPTP starts announcing how unreasonable the WGA is being, how it's misrepresenting their claims, how they don't understand how the business works, how there's this one case where the WGA demands would make everything worse for the writers involved.

It's all lies. Stand with the union. Trust them to know what's best for their workers.